Two sides to every story

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TNAY… says she doesn’t wish to judge anyone.

SPECIAL REPORT (Final of a four-part series)

‘Look at your own hubbies before going on a hair-pulling spree’

Federation of Chinese Association of Kuching, Samarahan and Serian Division Sarawak vice-chairperson Tnay Li Ping says eradicating prostitution is almost impossible as the problem does not lie with the woman but the man.

“From a woman’s point of view, our first instinct is to hit out at these massage parlours sprouting out in town but, there is another side to the coin.

“Without demand, why should there be a supply?” she asked.

Tnay estimated that there are over 200 massage parlours in Kuching and business is thriving with the extra service offered.

This has led to many women groups crying foul over the issue in the past but as always, people have a short memory and the outrage died down after a while.

She said many had the tendency to condemn the foreign women involved, especially the wives who felt that they were the victims.

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TNAY… says she doesn’t wish to judge anyone.

“They should also take a look at their own husbands before going on a hair-pulling spree with their women friends.

“Very often and understandable, the wives would be very emotional and want to hurt the other party once they know they were betrayed,” she said.

“I am not saying that women do not have the right to get angry but it is better to deal with this issue with a calm and clear mind.

“Getting a gang of female friends to fight it out with the third party is just humiliating oneself and making women look bad while the men get away with it,” she stressed.

Tnay said for wives to tell their husbands not to patronise such places depended very much on the husbands’ character, the values they have in treating their spouses.

“As a woman, I can say there are many ways to eke out a living but for these women who are willing to go to a foreign land and sell themselves, they must have their own issues to deal with.

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“I do not want to judge anyone here. Of course, this sort of business will hurt, and lead to broken families. And there is the disease to deal with,” she said.

To her, the forbidden fruit is something that is desired most. In some developed countries, it is one of the ways to be in some control of the trade and to prevent human trafficking.

“Red light districts are also found in Singapore and although it is not exactly legalised, she said there are some forms of control there like ensuring that the sex workers use protective methods to prevent disease and getting the women to go for health checks frequently.

“Here, even checking on legit massage parlours is slack as we lack in implementing and enforcing our laws thus things get out of control every time.

“That is why, police, immigration and councils should work together to conduct checks on premises that promote ‘extra’ services,” she added.

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Tnay said those who were found soliciting for sex should be deported and barred from entering again.

In general, foot massage is a legit business as many elderly and even women will go for a massage for health purposes.

“So, we cannot paint a picture that all massage parlours are involved in unhealthy practices and all massage girls are slim and beautiful and out to seduce the men.”

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