KUCHING: “If you are feeling lonely, in despair, we are here for you, you are not alone in this”.
This message is from a suicide prevention group Befrienders Kuching that is ready to lend an ear if you are facing any problems in life.
Befrienders Kuching Sarawak is a non-profit organisation providing emotional support to prevent suicide. It is a worldwide organisation and Kuching is its 9th centre in Malaysia.
The role of its members is to listen, be the friend you need, and most importantly, stop suicide attempts.
Suicide cases have been a concern in Sarawak. New Sarawak Tribune asked two active Befrienders Kuching volunteers whether the number of suicidal callers had increased since its establishment in August 2018.
Dr Mirunaaleni Selvaraju, 33, a medical doctor from the State Health Department and a committee member with Befrienders Kuching, have been handling calls and emails to the those who had reached out to the organisation for help. Together with her is another active volunteer, Brandon Lee, 19.
“Since the operation of the suicide prevention hotline in August 2018 till May 2019, we received up to 224 calls and the number is increasing. Most of the callers are females and the highest prevalence was from the age group between 21 and 30 years old. Almost one third reported to have suicidal thoughts and 5 per cent were at active risk of suicide,” she said.
Dr Mirunaaleni added most of the callers were lonely or in isolation, some were depressed, suffered from broken relationships, bereavement and health issues.
“Many people don’t know how to express their emotions and fears. They are lonely and end up taking their own lives. That is why we are here to listen.
“We are not here to advise the people on what to do, but we care more about their emotional state,” she explained.
Dr Mirunaaleni added that as the number of callers had increased, Befrienders Kuching has also started to befriend the needy group via e-mails since January this year.
She shared that from Jan till May this year, they had received 178 emails, mostly from the fairer sex.
“From the suicide thought assessment, 15 per cent were with suicide risk,” she said.
Dr Mirunaaleni said not all the callers had suicidal thoughts but some were lonely and needed someone to talk to.
“We also received calls and e-mails from those with gender issues.
“Most of the time they voice out their confusion and the fear of being judged because many people were still unable to accept them. So, we listen to what they need to say,” she said.
Apart from that, people reach out to them because of work and studies.
Befrienders receives up to five calls in a day and e-mails every day.
Mirunaaleni reiterated, “Befrienders does not provide counselling services but plays an important role by listening to the people and detecting their emotions.
“We are not in the position to say that what a person is doing is right or wrong, we don’t attend to their issues, but we attend to how they react with their emotions,” she said.
When asked what were the common phrases uttered by persons with suicidal thoughts, she replied, “Words like ‘there is nothing left’, ‘things are getting difficult’, ‘I just want to give up’, ‘I feel very tired’ and ‘I feel hopeless’.
“All these words do matter. We will ask them, “Why do you feel like that”, “Does it mean life has not been good to you?” and “Are you thinking about ending your life?”.
“And we have to ask accordingly, we cannot just assume. But usually callers will give us a hint when we can start asking about their suicidal thoughts,” she said, adding that callers could share their stories for more than three hours on the phone.
She then said sometimes callers would just call and start crying. If someone on the line wants to end his or her life, the volunteers are already trained on what to say and how to react.
“Worldwide, 800,000 people are committing suicide annually, that means every 40 seconds, there is someone committing suicide,” she pointed out.
“And according to the National Health Morbidity Survey in 2017, a study conducted by the Institute of Public Health, among all the states in Malaysia, Sarawak ranked the highest with adolescents attempting to do self harm because they felt lonely,” she said.
Concern over the numbers, she hoped more activities or programmes in Sarawak could be organised to increase public awareness of mental health.
Befrienders Kuching Sarawak currently has 30 volunteers, and 8 to 12 of them are actively attending to phone calls and e-mails.
It can be contacted at 082-242800 or by e-mail at sam@befrienderskch.org.my from6.30pm to 9.30pm everyday including public holidays.
Those who wish to support its programmes or know more about it can visit its Facebook page or Instagram at Befrienders Kuching Sarawak.
